Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn
21 hours ago
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Should I Stay or Should I Go?
So I'm innocently sitting in my Weight Watchers meeting tonight. I happen to be facing the door, which I don't normally. (To set the scene for you, the weigh-in room is the first room you walk in from the street. There's a doorway, and abra cadabra, there's the meeting room.) So, towards the end of the meeting, who walks in but two people I worked with this summer at my internship - my former supervisor and another woman! The meeting is near where I worked, so when I first started going I excepted to recognize people. (My internship was only for 3 months, it wasn't I walked out of there with millions of BFFs, but I did the networking thing.) The three of us had a nice exchange. They were only getting weighed, which might explain why I have NEVER seen them before at this meeting. (Okay, so I've only been going to this meeting for 4 weeks, but I saw it first.) I felt nearly naked even though the only thing I had removed in the last half hour were my flip flops! I consider my Weight Watchers experience to be a very vunerable moment in my week. Most of my friends don't even know I joined! I don't like to admit to potentially non-sympathetic, or mildly insensitive, people that I'm on Weight Watchers because it means I'm admitting there's something wrong with me. Somehow I have this insane notion that if I don't admit to people I think I'm fat they won't notice. Hah! Why, oh why, I ask do there have to be people I know at my WW meeting?! I fear that my best case scenario is a future of awkwardly sitting three in a row with these two women at meetings each week. So, I ask you, my friends, the ultimate question ... should I find a new meeting?
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8 comments:
I really don't think you should worry about it. They are there too! It's like a show I saw one time where a boy is in the library and the girl he likes walks in and he goes to his friend "oh no! I don't want her to see me hanging out in the library!" and his friend is like "dude, she's here too."
They are there too, and that means they are working on themselves just like you are. I really think you should look at it as a positive experience. IF you even end up seeing them there more, which you may not. But if you do, just act casual! Even though you might be afraid of being judged, they are worried a lot more about themselves.
I know when I go and weigh in, and they hand me back my little book, i walk into the meeting room and sit down and look in my book to see the result of my week - and that is my WHOLE world at that time. I'm not paying any attention to anyone else in the room.
I hope you'll be okay with this new development ;)
If that's what it takes for you to be comfortable and enjoy Weight watchers, then yes -- you should find a new meeting.
HOwever, there is another side to this, and that's that sometimes admitting your vulnerabilities helps you conquer them. I know I used to hide my Weight watcher status like it was leprosy, but once I lost a bit of weight and got to place where I felt more confident, I started screaming it from the rooftops. EVERYBODY now knows that I'm on WW. I'm very proud of it. ;-)
Just don't quit. If those two work people knew that they chased you out of your meeting, they'd probably offer to quit instead of you.
"Somehow I have this insane notion that if I don't admit to people I think I'm fat they won't notice. Hah!"
Oh man, I think we all feel that way to some extent. At least we think it won't cross their minds if we don't bring it up. That's why we get nervous when someone else's weight is mentioned or when a commercial for a weight loss product comes on the tv in mixed company. I know exactly what you mean. But I think if you can stand it, since they've already seen you anyway, you should keep going to your meeting.
Take a step back and remember that not only did they see YOU at a WW meeting, but you saw THEM at one.
The longer I live, the more I realize that it is insane to let anyone kick me out of a place that I find something I need. People have only as much power and pull over you as you allow them to have, and if you want to let these two have it--then switch!
I was just writing about the same core concepts the other day. I'm reminded by your words that we need to say these things out loud, post them for the world to read so that they have credence. Thank you!
Most importantly, I forgot to give you props on your name.
I LOVED the Trixie Belden series as a kid. Now I want to go and re-read them all...
I can't imagine how that means there is anything wrong with you. Maybe it just means like the majority of people in this country...you just never learned to eat right. At least you are doing something to make yourself better. Unlike the the people you perceive as sneering...who are liking shoving down fast food and chips right now.
That you're uncomfortable in the meetings but keep going shows just how determined you are to reach your goal. I think you should give yourself a big pat on the back for being willing to be that emotionally vulnerable in front of strangers. If it's making you even more uncomfortable to attend the meetings with the people that you know I'd encourage you to find another meeting. It's more important that you stick with WW than try to overcome what I think are some very normal emotions. Most important: Do whatever will make you the most comfortable sticking with the program.
Good luck to you!
The most important thing is to make sure that you are going to meetings. We all have our own reasons to cheat on WW and if you are going to skip a meeting because of people that you know are there it may cause you to sneak away from meetins.
Instead you can be the pro that know what to do and is a leader in changing your life. You can be proud of your WW meetings and the fact that you go.
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