Monday, April 07, 2008

Eating to Please Someone Else

Have you ever done that? Eating to please someone else? I haven't done it in such a long time and tonight I did and it feels awful. I was out to dinner with my Dad. We were trying a new restaurant that had 2 for 1 appetizers during happy hour. I will freely admit I agreed to the fried calamari and crab quesadillas. I will own those food choices and they were both good (the quesadillas were better than the calamari, if you must know, but both were "worth it".) But I was still hungry after the appetizers. I looked on the menu for a side salad. No luck. My Dad wasn't hungry for anything else, but his idea of an "evening snack" is half a bag of Lay's potato chips, so I knew he wasn't going to go hungry tonight. So, I saw the "Lobster & Seafood Salad" on the menu and order it without dressing. When it came I knew there was a problem, but I didn't speak up. I expected a bed of lettuce and tomato with some pieces of cold lobster and other various foods from the sea on top. Instead I was faced with a "seafood salad" kinda like tuna salad or chicken salad, neither of which I like. But, I didn't know how to say "Take it back, this isn't what I thought it was." My Dad is a clean plate club eater and also doesn't like to "make a scene" at restaurants. Sending food back is definitely "making a scene" in his book. So, I ate the "seafood salad," well part of it at least. I probably had about 1/3 of it and most of the lettuce. It didn't even taste good. The whole time I was upset and "eating for show." I basically ate enough to make it look like I liked it. I even asked for a box to take the rest home! (He thinks I'm going to eat the rest for lunch tomorrow, but he isn't very observant, so I can probably throw it away without him noticing.) I'm not even sure how bad the food was for me, even though it did seem thoroughly unhealthy. I'm just upset that I ate something to please someone else. I can turn down candy, cake, and lots of other things, but tonight I just couldn't do it. I didn't want him to waste his money. If I had been paying, I probably would have sent it back. Ugh. I am mentally and physically a little ill this evening.

Have you ever eaten to please someone else?


Kim said...

YES. :( I still find myself doing it at times. You know, trying to fit in, not wanting to draw attention to my "new and stringent eating demands." blah. Sorry that you had to put on the brave face for your dad. On the bright side - tomorrow is a new day. One without seafood salad. :)

Vickie said...

my oldest (18 year old boy) says that I ask so many questions - that I can't go back anywhere a second time.

My husband is often ordering fish and then very surprised when it is served fried (in Indiana, one should never be surprised by this).

It has happened to him so many times that I now know to pipe up and say - how is that fish prepared???, when he orders.

I think the term "salad" when it is mixed with mayo is a real mislabel. When it is mixed with mayo (chicken, tuna, egg, and now I guess we are adding lobster to the list) - it definitely should be called something else.

I also think that most menus are worded very imprecise.

Anonymous said...

Definitely! It can be hard especially when someone else is paying. It would never offend me because I would much rather have my guest happy than forcing down food, but I know not everyone looks at it that way.

I probably would have sent it back anyway, but that is me. :)