Kate Harding's Shapely Prose

So, I was just hanging out on the Angry Fat Girlz blog and saw a reference to Kate Harding's blog Shapely Prose and thought I would visit it. I. Am. Blown. Away. I haven't gotten through many of the back posts, but I want to draw your attention to these posts:

* Don't You Realize Fat is Unhealthy? ... Here she talks about blogging about fat acceptance

* It's Not All About You (Or Me) ... Here she talks about how blogging negatively about ourselves effects other bloggers. I am guilty of this, but in my defense I think we have to learn from our mistakes. I think self-acceptance is difficult for most of us.

I've only spent about 10 minutes on her blog and I am dying to meet her and have a cup of coffee with her and pick her brain. I don't know how you all feel about the concept of "fat acceptance," but I am all for acceptance movements and I am still having conflicting feelings about all the compliments I receive for losing weight. (I mean, wasn't I a good person before I lost all the weight? Didn't I deserve attention then too?)

So, Happy Friday!

Packing

So I just dropped my parents off at the airport. It is always nice hanging out with them for the holidays. I am back in my apartment, which is now starting to look like someone is actually moving out on Saturday (which would be me). There are empty boxes in the corner waiting to be packed ... My dining room/office is now the moving staging area where furniture that has been deconstructed and boxes that have been packed are being stored until they are taken to my sister's house. We took two car loads over there yesterday. I'm going to try to take over more on Friday - and hopefully I'll be able to get another load over there sooner so that Saturday morning will be pretty easy and just my furniture. I have lovely friends who are helping out my sister, brother-in-law and I on Saturday. I just don't want to wear them out - did I mention I live in a 4th floor walk-up?

Yesterday I probably climbed the 3 flights of stairs to my apartment 5-10 times and, shockingly, my legs don't feel it today. I don't know if it is the running or the weight loss - probably both. And, I felt fine doing the moving up and down the stairs. It is awesome to feel this healthy and capable!

Okay, so at this point I am basically procrastinating either a) packing or b) grading extra credit assignments. I kinda want to go back to bed, but that would be the pinnacle of laziness. I need a game plan for packing the rest of my stuff. I think I am going to search online for packing tips. I'll share any good ones I find.

Random/Weird Things About Me

Okay, so I just got home from AT. "Black Friday" as they like to call it in the retail industry wasn't as scary as I thought it was going to be, or maybe our store just sucks - ha ha ha. (Don't get me started on how corporate screwed up the Q4 '07 fragrance launch!) I'm just glad to be home and I gain more respect for service industry workers every day.

So, Alanna has tagged me (thanks for thinking of me Alanna!). The subject is weird/random things about me. Well, you be the judge if they are weird or random, or even actually about me:

1. One of my best friends won the National Spelling Bee in junior high and was on Johnny Carson (Yes, I'm so old that Carson hosted the Tonight Show. We were bummed she didn't get invited onto Letterman.)

2. I played soccer for 8 years as a kid and in high school, but quit my senior year to become a pom pom girl with the marching band. My reverse-feminist act of teenage rebellion. Yes, damn it, I am smart, and yes, damn it, I want to wear a short skirt and shake pom poms at the Friday night football games! Ah, my misspent youth.

3. When I lived in NYC I volunteered with the Central Park Conservancy to do gardening in Central Park. It's like having this huge, famous backyard where you get to plant flowers.

4. At my first job I named a mixed drink for Grand Marnier, but they never marketed it. It was called the Grand Parisian (I know, super creative. I came up with 200 names. There was a $250 prize and I wanted the money baaaad :) I think they call it the Grand Cosmopolitan instead.

5. My family's nickname for me is Lump because my initials are LMP. It's endearing, believe it or not.

Okay, now I have to tag people. I pick ...

Angelfish24 at Patience
Vickie at Baby Steps V
Kim Under Construction

I want to see hear some random and crazy stuff people! :)

Pre-Thanksgiving Edition

Hey there, so I am packing up for a short trip for Thanksgiving and then I have to work at AT on Friday and Saturday, so I won't be around for a few days. I got in a C25K training "run" this morning. I started Week 3 - so I had to run for 3 minutes straight. I was kinda nervous about it, but it ended up being fine. I wasn't too out of breath at the end of the 3 minutes and I felt like I could have run longer. My left heel was bothering me the whole time though (and my underwear was falling down the whole time - I haven't replaced my workout shorts or most of my underwear since I lost all the weight. Looks like I know what I'm going to be putting on my Christmas list :) It really isn't bothering me now, and it wasn't bothering me during the walking intervals. I don't know if it was psychosomatic pain or just stiffness in the morning. I'll keep you posted if it happens again. I'm planning on at least one long walk tomorrow, nothing on Friday (traveling and working at AT) and then running again on Saturday before I got to AT in the evening. I'm really liking this running thing. My mom was shocked when I told her I got up this morning and ran before breakfast. I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks!

I hope you all have a wonderful holiday whether you spend it alone or with family and friends. I'm thankful for all of you! Happy Thanksgiving!

Cupcakes

The potluck dinner on Saturday was fun, but it was an eating minefield. I did pretty well and avoided the things I couldn't identify the points for. But, I indulged on 2 small potato pancakes, 2 Black & Tans and 1 Magnolia Bakery cupcake (which I haven't had since I left NYC). I could have done without the potato pancakes, but the other choices were definitely worth it - although I probably would have been just as happy only having one drink instead of two (I was a little foggy the next day. I'm still getting used to alcohol at this weight.) According to my new points allotment I still have 16.5 flex points left for the week and since my weigh-in day is Thursday, Thanksgiving starts a new week for me. I'm glad I don't have temptations like this every weekend! I don't know how you guys with active social lives do it!

I did the 3rd workout for week 2 of C25K today. It was awesome. I felt really good and strong. And it was the first time I didn't get any cramps or stomach problems. I wonder if it was because I hadn't eaten for like 6-7 hours before I ran. Other runs I had eaten an hour or two before.

Oh, I wanted to thank Vickie for the suggestion of the maintenance blog to visit. I had gone there, but I haven't checked her archives, which I think I would relate to more. If anyone else has any new blogs they think I should stop by, please suggest them!

Lovely day for a Black & Tan

Thanks for all of your lovely comments about reaching my goal! It is so great to get all of your support! It really meant a lot to me! :)

So, I am getting used to my new daily WW points. Now that I'm on maintenance I have 24 points, up from 20. I told myself on Thursday that I was going to try to ease into it. So, on Thursday I only used 21 points. Then yesterday I used 26.5 points. Ooops. I did "earn" 2 activity points - an overly generous allotment for my Couch-2-5K workout on Friday. I guess I'm just getting used to handling more points. I mean, of course there were days when I'd use 26 points, 6 being flex points, when I only had 20 daily points. (Sometimes I feel like a crazy person with all this talk of points, but I actually do think it is easier than calories. But, whatever works for you is what I say.) So, what I am trying very badly to say is that I am trying to not over analyze things, but to stay "on plan" as the kids like to say these days.

I have a potluck to go to tonight. I was going to be a good little WW person and make something from a WW recipe. Instead I have decided to bring a not-so-WW friendly drink to the party - ingredients for a Black & Tan (Smithwick's, or Bass, topped with Guinness). [The theme was bring a dish or beverage from your ethnic background, and I'm Irish.] It is an odd choice, because I don't really drink anymore. I don't plan on having more than one. I hope everyone else isn't as lazy as I am and that they actually bring food! Although I did eat a late lunch on purpose so I wouldn't be ravenous when I was surrounded by all the food. I'll let you know how it went tomorrow.

So ... I Hit Goal Today :)

Yep, that's right, I hit my WW goal today! I was hoping it was going to happen. I closed my eyes when I stepped on the scale. My meeting leader weighed me and didn't understand why I had my hands covering my eyes (why I did it I don't know because you can't see the read-out). Then he looked at my card and gave me a high five. Some people in line were super cute and said supportive things. It was nice. I hung my WW star charm on my WW 10% key chain. For now, that's all the "reward" I need. I had said I wanted to commemorate my loss with a piece of jewelry, but that isn't in the financial cards right now. Maybe I'll celebrate some other way that doesn't cost money.

I'm nervous about maintenance. I'm definitely one of those people who is scared to eat more. I think what Mouse is doing - taking pictures of her food - is great, but my digital camera doesn't work so that's not an option. I need to concentrate on adding more protein to my diet, not more pretzels :)

It's been a long journey, but in some ways the past 15 months its take to get here have just flown by. One thing I have learned through this trip is that it is the little victories, the 0.4 lb losses or choosing smaller portions, that are necessary and make up the larger victory. I didn't lose over 83 lbs. all at once. It helps to know that with other goals that I set for myself I may not achieve them overnight, but with hard work and dedication, I can achieve them. Right now those goals are going to be 1) maintenance, 2) job search, 3) running - but not necessarily in that order :)

Thanks for all your support! I couldn't have done this without you - even the lurkers :)

Running at 14 vs. 34

C25K was tougher today. I moved to Week 2's workout. I didn't remember it correctly, so I alternated between running for 90 seconds and walking for 60. Your walking interval is supposed to be 2 minutes each. I don't know why I insist on making this training harder than it already is. I think I am going to do it the right way on Thursday when I workout again, or at least walk in 90 second intervals. Running for the first 60 seconds felt pretty comfortable, but the next 30 seconds I definitely noticed was tougher. Still, I could do it without being completely out of breath at the end of the 90 seconds. I'd like to say that my body remembers running and is just readjusting to it - from the days when I played soccer in high school and had 2 hour practices every day. But, that was like 20 years ago (1986-1989 - I'm old!), so it is pretty ridiculous to say that my body is "remembering" anything. But, I am still enjoying myself and looking forward to my workouts. In fact today I cut my errands short so that I could go home and workout. I was all stressed out and needed a release. I remember hating running laps at practice. Now I'm nowhere near running as much as I did then, but its interesting how something you once hated is now something you look forward to.

Treats

So, I avoided the siren's song of Mrs. Fields' cookies today. I always get a medium Diet Coke from there when I work at AT. I don't know why I tempt myself by going there, but I do. Probably because their medium Diet Coke's are big enough to stick your head in. At first it was "every once in a while" that I would get a "nibbler" - her mini cookies. Then it was just one every time. Then on Saturday I had 3. That's okay, but I realized that I wasn't enjoying them that much. That was the kicker. I am all for having cookies, but you have to really enjoy them. If you aren't enjoying it, it's not worth finishing. So today I actually went there twice and didn't succumb. Now I need to find a new treat that is worth it (sorry Mrs. Fields). I'll keep you posted.

Lazy Sunday + C25K Training = Gold

Today is a nice day. I don't have to work at AT and I am pretty well all set with my lecture for class tomorrow. I have a little bit of studying to do, but not much. It's on different types of sales promotions, so it is something all the kids can relate to.

I just got back from the gym - did my last workout for the first week of Couch-2-5K. (I didn't use the incline function like the girl at my WW meeting suggested, but I up'ed the "speed.") It was great! I'm still really liking this and looking forward to running. I felt really confident running and sometimes didn't even check the clock on the treadmill until after I had already run for 60 seconds. I know it doesn't sound like much, but for me, the perpetual non-runner, it is. I'm looking forward to trying the 2nd level, which I think is running for 90 seconds and then walking for 90 seconds for 20 minutes. I'm trying to take a day off in between workouts. I never did that before when I was riding the recumbent bike, but I think it is a good idea since running is using your whole body. Tell me what you guys think.

I have been noticing my body jiggling a lot when I run (I need a new sports bra). I am definitely not toned. But I'm wearing an over sized long-sleeved t-shirt and pretty big shorts, so no one can really see much. No one was in the gym (it's in my apartment complex), so I didn't have a pace car, but the show I was watching on TV had a segment where a guy was running around a track and that was fun to try to keep pace with.

Okay, off to the grocery store and Target - my favorite store in the whole world. But I was just there on Friday, so I probably won't spend too much time there today.

Up in the Air

So I have been eating non-stop today ... pretzels, Taco Bell !?!, Starbucks. I have made pretty healthy choices within those categories, but it still hasn't been a great day. I decided to have eggplant for dinner tonight to be healthy. (Not to worry about not eating enough, I had a late lunch.) I fell in love with eggplant when a friend made it for dinner this summer. I am pairing it with a nice Cabernet/Merlot. I don't drink much any more, but my sister was talking about what she was having for dinner and the wine she was serving and it is dark and rainy outside, so wine sounded like a nice, special idea. I know it will add more points to an already point-heavy day, but I'm saying what the hell, live a little!

So, an anonymous poster asked about some incline advice I had gotten from a WW friend. Unfortunately, it wasn't detailed advice. The WW friend just suggested not using the incline function on my treadmill to save my shins from the stress. She made it sound like it was a bad idea to use it. She did talk about running on pavement, but didn't talk about whether or not she does hills, so I don't know if it is only inclines on treadmills she doesn't like. Sorry I can't be more specific. I'll ask her more questions at next week's meeting and post her answers.

The move to Vegas is 95% a go. I gave notice at Ann Taylor. Thanksgiving weekend is my last day. I'm waiting to hear about a full-time job I'm up for around here. I guess I really won't know until December, but I am definitely giving up my apartment the first week of December and moving in with my sister and brother-in-law. And then there's the job in Vegas I interviewed for today. As you can see, things are pretty up in the air. But, I'll keep you all posted! :)

Couch-to-5K Training Session #2

So, I "ran" again today on the treadmill. I felt a little more confident when I started, but it was actually a little harder to breath for the first 10 minutes than it was during my first "running" workout. It got easier as I stuck with it. And another woman came into the gym and started running on one of the other treadmills. I thought it was going to make me self-conscious, but instead it was nice to try to keep pace with her. I think I did my best when I was running "with" her. I'm sure her speed was set faster than mine, but it still made me feel somewhat like a real runner :) (I know, I'm getting ahead of myself!) I am definitely going to do it again on Saturday or Sunday, depending on my work schedule at AT. I got some good advice about inclines and shoes from a girl I see at my WW meetings. It also gave me an excuse to strike up a conversation - I've been wanting to talk with her because she is close to goal too and I wanted to know how she feels about it. I guess that would have been reason enough to talk with her. I just get shy sometimes. I know, shocking! :)

P.S. I'm 0.6 lbs. from goal!

It would be great if I could make Lifetime before I move to Vegas, but I think that is a little unrealistic. Actually, I haven't figured it out if it's even possible. I'll let you all know.

Luck Be a Lady

Thanks for all your supportive comments on my new running adventures! I'll post tomorrow on how workout #2 goes!

So I got some good news today... I applied for the MBA Leadership Development Program of one of the big casino chains in Las Vegas and I've scored a first round phone interview on Friday! (I know I've been a little cagey about what I was in school for - I got my MBA, with a concentration in Marketing. Now that I'm out of school and there is little fear one of my classmates is going to find this blog, I feel 100% more comfortable talking about myself in specifics.) I applied because my parents live there and that is the industry of choice in Vegas. When in Rome ... :)

Ready to Run

You'll never guess what you all inspired me to do today ... Run! I actually started the Couch-to-5K workout! I just got back from the gym, but my jacket away and started typing this post. It was awesome! I haven't tried to run since I played soccer in high school. (This includes when it rains and I have to walk from the car into the supermarket. I just walk because it always felt awkward or hurt my shins to "sprint" inside.) I did a 5 minute warm-up walk, which was good, because it got me used to the treadmill and my iPod. Then I did 20 minutes alternating running for 60 seconds and walking for 60 seconds. I was so inspiring and just the right way to start. I felt alive and powerful and capable! (And to think I was depressed all day today and almost took a nap instead of going to workout!) - Can you tell I like exclamation points today! - Around minute 9 my stomach started to hurt. It wasn't sharp cramps, just a low dull ache. I think it was because I had eaten about an hour before I started working out. But the alternating walking and running made it easy to work through. And I LOVED listening to my iPod while working out. I had never understood that before. I always read magazines on the recumbent bike. But the music was so motivating. Believe it or not the song that was playing when I ended the 5 minute warm-up and literally started running, was "Ready to Run" by the Dixie Chicks. It was fate. I would do it all over again tomorrow, but the training guide says to take breaks between workouts and not go to fast, even if you think you can. So, I'm listening to the experts and not doing this again until Thursday. I didn't even manage to do a mile (just 0.94 according to the treadmill). I walked for a few minutes after the alternating and it took me up to a mile. I'm not really concerned too much about distance, but it did seem rather short considering I used to walk that far to and from work when I lived in New York. Is it crazy that I'm thinking of signing up for a 5K race in Las Vegas since I'm most likely moving there in December? If running and I continue to get along (which I know there will be ups and downs) it will be awesome to be in Vegas this winter b/c I won't have to contend with freezing temps and snow. Okay, so I'm getting a little ahead of myself. Any advice on running would be most appreciated!

Better Than I Thought

So the guest speaker went better than I thought it was going to. She talked about a lot of the topics and concepts I have been teaching about all semester. It was good to have some real life examples of these concepts. It was, unfortunately, not interactive. She invited them to ask questions throughout the presentation, and a few did, but for the love of God, they are undergrads, they aren't going to pepper her with questions at 9:30am on a Monday. So, it was a very one sided "lecture." I am definitely having an activity to get the class interacting on Thursday. I was embarrassed that this one jackass read the paper during class and wasn't very discreet. I had meant to tell him not to before class started, but I was talking to my guest lecturer and forgot. Can you tell he's getting a D for class participation this semester? He is beyond clueless, but he should know better.

I think I might go to that rec center in the next town over tomorrow to do laps. I haven't been there in about a month and I want to get 2 more workouts in before Thursday. I don't have to teach again until Thursday and I don't have to work at AT again until Saturday. So, that gives me plenty o' time to look for a full-time job, which I have been neglecting, and workout.

Working Weekend

Today was more about work and less about being healthy. I had a meeting at Ann Taylor from 8a-10a, then I had to work there from 1:30-4:30pm and before and after I was grading exams. I'm disappointed because my students did worse on this exam than on the first one, and they didn't do so hot on the first one. Some students get As and Bs, so I know I'm not missing all of them, but I'm so disappointed with the ones who are basically failing. I'm going to change around how I teach the remainder of the semester to hope to reach those students who just aren't digesting information through the lectures. Tomorrow I have a friend coming in as a guest speaker. I hope they like her. I hope they behave. Actually, I've never worried about them behaving before, so I don't know why I'm so worried. I looked over her presentation. It's a little dry (kinda like my lectures :). And it doesn't seem like there's any room for audience participation. They are going to be falling asleep half way through it! But, it's a break from hearing me speak, so that is good.

Sorry to ramble about non-weight loss things, I'm just stressed and trying to control things that I can't control. And I'm trying to keep myself away from the pretzels. I've already eaten too many for today (4-6 points). I'll let you know how the guest speaker goes tomorrow.

A Voice from the Past

I'm so glad I have this blog. I love sharing things with all of you, but I also love being able to go back to entries from last year and hear my own voice. I looked for a post I knew I had written in September 2006 about the top 5 things I'd like to do when I lost weight - things I was looking forward to. If you don't want to click through, here is the list:

# 5 Eat food in public without feeling like people are saying, "of course she eats that way, look at her" - I still get a little self-conscious when I'm not eating healthy, but not like I used to be. But I figure, I can eat what I want - no one knows what else I've eaten or done exercise-wise that day.

# 4 Wear a skirt without needing a girdle to prevent my thighs from rubbing together - I LOVE this one. I gave my girdle the heave-ho in May. I love wearing skirts now. I even bought a pair of shorts this summer.

# 3 Button my suit jacket - This one makes me really proud. I just got to button my suit jacket yesterday and it felt great.

# 2 Buy clothes in a real store instead of needing to buy the bigger sizes online - It is so weird to be able to do this. It is really confusing too - I have to stop myself from reaching for the bigger sizes.

# 1 Stop assuming the reason why a guy isn't interested is because of how much I weigh - I haven't really been thinking lately about guys all that much. I'm pretty shy and self-conscious. I don't think I'm ready to date yet.

I wonder how I'll feel in the fall of 2008.

The Good Ole Hockey Game

So I had a pretty good day today. (I'm still counting this as Friday since I haven't gone to bed yet.) Here's my good/bad list for the day ...

Good: Interview for a real full-time career-oriented job went well
Bad: Not sure how I feel about the guy who'd be my boss

Good: Had impromptu invite to see the Capitals play the Flyers
Bad: Capitals lost

Good: Actually did my aerobics with weights exercise DVD
Bad: Didn't even break into a light sweat until the last 5 minutes of the workout

Bad: Went to Wendy's for lunch/dinner
Good: Only ate 1/2 of my small fries and had a plain hamburger (okay, with the bun)

Good: Got a nice compliment from a friend of my sister's about how I look now
Bad: Had to listen to him talk endlessly about his "good eating" habits in the same breath as he's describing how he binges on food and alcohol every 4 weeks (I had no idea what to say!)

Okay, off to bed. Actually I'll probably watch an episode of Law & Order Criminal Intent first. I love that show!

Turning Over a New Leaf

Okay, so we are coming down to the wire folks. I'm so close to goal, my current weight on my tracker on my blog is covering my goal weight! (Look up at the top of the screen.) I'm getting excited. Someone in my WW meeting today reached goal. She was beaming. I don't think I really accepted the fact that it was so close. I don't know if I'll reach it by Thanksgiving, but it is a definite possibility. (I have 1.8 lbs. to go.) So, with this realization, I am vowing to turn over a new leaf ...

Inspired by Jessica over at Weight of my World, I am joining her November challenge. Below are my goals for the month:

* It's National Blog Posting Month and people are supposed to pledge to write in their blogs everyday. So, even if it is more boring than taxes (sorry accountants), I'm going to write something everyday. (See you back here tomorrow :) - I'm actually looking forward to this.

* I vow to exercise at least 3 times per week. I'm really going to do this. You WILL see the exercise ticker on my blog move this month! I will learn to exercise on land, or start going to the community pool in the next town over.

* I vow to drink at least 24 oz of water every day. I know this isn't much, but I am sooo not a water drinker (I have Diet Pepsi pumping through my body), so this is a big deal for me. I like drinking out of plastic bottles though, so the 12 oz size is perfect for me.

* I vow to try running (possibly with the podcast idea, thanks Amanda) at least 4 times this month. That is one time per week. I probably should do it more consistently, but this way, if I try one week and don't do it consistently, I can feel good about picking up from the beginning and trying again the following week.

I don't have any goals about pounds to lose because I don't know when I'm going to reach goal and I don't know what my body is going to do in maintenance, or if I am going to want to continue losing, so I don't want to put any expectations on myself. This is going to be a month of Non-Scale Victories. Tomorrow I am going to lace up my running shoes if it is the last thing I do! :)